I read what is written on the headstones. Look at the dates. Some who passed have been buried in this cemetery over one hundred and fifty years. I think about what it means to be dead. No longer alive. I walk very slowly my bicycle rolling along next to me. A number of stones are no longer legible. The elements over so long a period have obscured the words so dear once carved in the granite. Such a vast expanse of time preceded this person’s life and such a vast expanse of time has elapsed since their demise – their life was just a flicker. A wink. A flash. A leaf blown into eternity by a gust of wind. So long ago no one even remains to remember them. Makes me melancholy.

Is there life after death? Methinks the uncertainty is no accident. The architect of life left the blueprint incomplete to make us wonder. So we would have to live life in the constant shadow of death. Always hearing news of death and sometimes seeing death first hand. Mortal and animal. The author of the play knew death would infuse each act and each scene of the comic/tragedy with meaning. That the choices of every clown or villain on the stage, whether a minor or major character, would be super consequential because, for one and all, there is a line of demarcation betwixt life and death. The gravity of the grave vexes the spirit and puzzles the will. That glint in your eye will dim. The quickness of that tongue will still as you utter that final sentence. As eternity swallows your humanity and begins to measure all you said and did on this Earth.

Is there life after death? The hope and fear and mystery swirling in your spirit to discover an answer is a calculated dilemma. The result of the dean of the school of life you are attending choosing to make it part of the curriculum. It is the final question on your final exam. No use looking on the paper of the student sitting next to you who studied harder. He/she doesn’t know the answer either. The wise surmise that the most minute detail of our life, even decisions that seemed a mere trifle, and especially our interaction with others, will end up being weightier in importance than we could have imagined. Because of one thing. They revealed what was in our heart. The lines each character speaks and the actions of each character all go to show the character of the character and the why behind why the playwright put them in the play.

Is there life after death? After death you’ll see that question was nonsensical. When you leave this world and land in the next you’ll be wondering if what you experienced here even qualified to be called life. Now loosed from this mortal coil and drenched in inexpressible happiness certain to never end – all you experienced in what you once called your life will seem less than lifelike. Life will be redefined in terms devoid of war, disease, sorrow, pain, disappointment, depression, agony. Death you’ll now know was eleven in the morning at the age of eleven at the gates of Disneyland with a free pass in hand and a ticket denoting unlimited rides. But, for some, the life to come will be doubly deadly. And looking back upon their life will be an excruciating exercise in remorse that will never stop. This we wish upon no one.

written October 10, 2009

by Stuart Charles Diamond